|"Did anyone notice that that Bob The Newt logo looks like a man with an extremely large penis?"|
|The Deception of a Life Time|
|Date: ||07/27/03 11:07|
|Game Type: ||Starcraft|
|Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 6, Min: 6|
Lifetime Rating for BlueRibbon: 7.4348
The Deception of a Life Time
Let me clarify, this isn't a fanfic despite the absence of a video game. And although there is only two pictures, I can assure you this is a Battlereport. This report unlike most, took place in real life.
The year is 1805. Napoleon Bonaparte is in power in France is Emperor. Soon after assuming full power from the consulate that he helped create, Austria declared war on Napoleon. Although Napoleon had defeated them before in Italy as a young General, the Austrians took no notice and quickly attacked. However, Napoleon's wiser officers, and his overall brilliance on the battlefield eventually pushed the Austrian's all the way back to Austerlitz, their capital. He besieged Austerlitz, and eventually the Austrian's surrendered to Napoleon, granting him concessions for there foolishness. However, not finishing them might have been even a larger blunder than his famous Invasion of Russia. This Report takes place between the time Napoleon reached Austerlitz from France.
Murat, Lannes, and Blliard, 3 of Napoleon's officers (known as Marshal's, of whom Murat, and Ney are the most famous) get on their horses and ride down to the bridge.
"Gentlemen.." announces Murat, "You are aware that the Thabor bridge is mined, and doubly mined, and that there are menacing fortifications at its head, and an army of fifteen thousand has been ordered to blow it up and not let us cross? But it will please our Sovereign, The Emperor Napoleon, if we should take it. So let us take it?"
"Yes lets indeed!" reply Belliard, and Lannes.
These gentlemen ride onto the bridge alone, and wave white handkerchiefs. They greet the officer who is on duty, and roughly state their claim.
"Officer, we wish to parley with your Prince, Prince Auersperg!" demands Lannes.
"You are Napoleon's Marshal, are you not? Please pass knowing you are in parley." replies a tired officer.
"Aye, we shall." snorts Belliard.
After passing the Officer onto the, 'Tete du pont'(bridgehead) they make for the group of Officers. They are standing at a table that surrounded by some of Austria's best Generals. Maps are spread over the tables and pieces mark locations of units. As they approach, one officer takes notice of them.
"Ahhh Marshal, you are under parley?"
"Indeed, yes. We seek Prince Auersperg!" Greets Belliard.
"Napoleon has sent us to tell the Prince ourselves, that the war is at an end! Napoleon rides to meet with Francis I!" says Murat.
"Ah, if such a thing is true we must surely get Prince Auersperg right away! I shall go get him he is in the back of the camp." replies the Officer.
Meanwhile the Officers and the Marshals crack jokes well drinking wine. They sit on Austrian cannon's, and talk about how they are pleased that they will not have to fight one another. During this extended period A French Battalion arrives at the Bridge unobserved. After about ten minutes of this the Officer returns with a man on horseback behind him.
"Ah, The Lieutenant-General Prince Auersperg von Mautern! Flower of the Austrian Army! Hero of the Turkish Wars! We can at last shake hands for the War is over! Napoleon is arranging to meet your father, and burns with desire to make your acquaintance at the meeting." tells Murat.
"My dear Marshals! Is this the Truth? The war is over? This is excellent news! Officers, tell the men they can stand down, for the war is over!" replies the Prince with delight.
The great words, and the udder amazement that the French Marshals regarded the Prince by made him totally forgot that he should be firing at the enemy, not drinking wine with them! The French Battalion realizing that the bridge was defenseless rushed at it with all speed.
A Sergeant who obviously did not trust these Frenchmen, had remained at his post, and when he saw the French coming for the Bridge ran to fire the gun to destroy the Bridge. However, Lannes in return, noticing he was going to scuttle the bridge, quickly stayed his hand. The Sergeant noticing what was going on ran to his Prince and yelled,
"You are being decieve--" unable to finish his sentence before Murat broke in.
With feigned astonishment he turned to the Prince and said, "I do not recognize the famous Austrian Discipline, when a subordinate is allowed to address you in such a manner!"
The Prince realizing his dignity was on the line, promptly had the man arrested before he was aloud to speak. With that brilliant stroke of wordplay, Murat, and the other two Marshal's had taken the bridge. The French rushed across the bridge and destroyed the guns pointed at it. The French victory at the Bridge Thabor was a brilliant stroke of Deception (the best in my opinion.) Though the French inevitably lost to Austrians in 1812 and 1814, you must realize the Austrian's were aided by the British, Prussian's, and Russian's, and that the Austrian's were late in arriving to France in 1814 which by then the British and the Prussian's had already routed the French at Waterloo.
~And you thought Backstabbing your ally on BGH was deception :O~
'All warfare is based on deception.
Therefore, when capable, feign incapacity;
When active, inactivity...
Offer the enemy a bait to lure him
Feign disorder and strike him
Pretend inferiority and encourage his arrogance.'
~Sun Tzu: The Art of War~