your home for Starcraft Home Forum Starcraft Tournaments

"I've been controlling the game up till now, and I'm damn well going to keep controlling it"

A 7-Player NH FFA
View or Add Comments (# of comments thus far: 94)
Date: 01/30/03 06:01
Game Type: Starcraft
Categorize this report
Report Rating: 9.2, # of Ratings: 4, Max: 10, Min: 9
Lifetime Rating for Jaood: 9.0000
BW FFA - Brought to you by Jaood

Let's get back to basic battlereporting styles, no background colors, black and white text, just text and pics. I never figured out why Netscape users couldn't see colored text in my last report, and not caring enough to correct this problem I decided to go for that simplistic look. :D

The game started out as much as any other mass money map ffa does, childish commentary and the overuse of the word penis. But what made this game special, better than most other gay ~nohunters ffa? The people!

The Players
Fox^1: In the orange corner we have a legend, Fox^1, birdless slayer of lions from Guam. In his never ending search for a challenge this quarky character "accidentally" destroyed the nohunters forum. Oh, he's also an admin or something, but I doubt anyone cares. He was Terran. Don't know how well he would do, as he doesn't play broodwar much. Oh, he orchestrated this ffa, too, so props to him.

DivvyO: DivvyO, master of cakes. Go visit his site at Funny guy, makes Underscore comics. He was white Zerg. I know his name may be hard to read, but don't worry, it won't appear much.

SlingsNArrows: Newest forum admin for Known for his addictive drug habits and unquenching thirst for alcohol Slings represents yellow Protoss. Rumor has it he is a bm ffa toss player, we shall see, no? Oh, I might meet him one day next month, so if he suddenly stops coming to the forum rest assured it's because he's dead, Anathema payed me off =[.

Jaood: Self-proclaimed FFA Master due to his above average win rate of ffas. People tell me Bob_the_Newt is the true master, but since Bob has vanished off the face of the Earth I hold the title kakakak#$!!!@! I get gay purple Protoss. If I were a betting man I'd place a wager on me winning this ffa.

=]]: Formerly known as ko[b]old, probably the nicest of all the players. But this is ffa, where gay strats and being BM are key. Highly skilled though, he is like an assassin. Not to be confused with the other homosexual -;- this face, whom I like to call smiley, stands a pretty good chance of winning. Blue Terran.

amat: Ok, this guy is actually a mystery to me. I used to think he was (Tiamat), you know, because it made sense. But I found out he isn't, so I don't know what to say about him except he is brown Zerg.

Keanu_Reaver: Lastly we have Keanu_Reaver, whom many of you know. He's like this Zerg guru after his BroodWar training in the far west. Another good choice for winner of the ffa. He met Anathema once. They had an interesting discussion on random stuff which can be found here. This teal Zerg is also a master celebrity name/starcraft unit name designer guy. Keanu_Reaver, Keanu Reeves....get it? :[

The Map:
Fažtežt Požžible Map Ever

Now this is a map I'm not to familiar with. It took me forever to find the entrance to my base. So, basically it's a symetrical 8 player map, each base with 1.24x10^27 gas geysers, and to the innocent eye 1 mineral patch. But a true sc player knows that this just can not be, because there are like 40 crystal patches stacked onto each other, and the start location has been edited to be right next to all the resources. This means faster resources for quicker capital ships.


Most of the players spent a few moments trying to understand the concept of super close resources and the lack of any change in terrain. Then we all got to mining, and with all the extra cash flowing in our builds got kinda funkified.

The protoss players started out by getting what forms the structural backbone of a toss strat in mass money maps, the forge. The terrans all go for depot/gas/rax for tech. Keanu opts for pool first, while amat makes triple hatc before pool. Obviously, he was quite secure with his hatc/drone micro in case of a rush. Oh, the reason DivvyO won't appear much in this ffa is because 2 minutes into the game he pulls a pre-emptive T_mac tactic and promptly disconnects. Since that's the last we will be hearing from him and he won't get much publicity today I'd just like to say he has a large penis.

Defensive wise the zerg players build multiple sunkens throughout their base, and spore colonies located around their resources. The protoss cannon up nice and tight, and ironically the terran players are the ones who leave their entrance totally open, exposed to any sort of rush or attack.

Bold (blue) seems to be having trouble resource wise and only pumps vults from 2 facts, and starts laying mines outside his base. Fox has triple facts producing tanks/vultures, starport, acadmey, e-bay, and a bunch of turrets spread across his base. Keanu has teched up to Lair level and is morphing a muta den while amat is busy turtling and producing hydra. Of the 3 races the protoss seem to be behind a bit in force/army. Slings has maybe 4 zealots and 1 gateway, cycore, and a robo warping in. My own forces include 2 zealots, a gateway, citadel, warping archive, triple robo fac, and support bay. Now, my plan is to mass annoy people by dropping 8-16 reavers on them. It's a long term plan. But other then the 2 zealots(non-speed) i have no mobile defense/offense.

But Fox would have none of this. Fox, having lost a vulture to my cannon wall earlier, seemed to want to enact some revenge on me for the loss of his biker. He loaded up 2 tanks in a dropship and flew his way around amat's base, past my cannons, and into my main. He unloaded the tanks close to my probes, sieged up and let loose holy hell onto my econ, killing a good 16 probes. At this point I wasn't feeling like bothering with them, but then I thought no way I could let Fox beat me with 2 tanks alone, so I had my zealots attack the tanks. Fox plays a game of drop/pick up the tanks all throughout my base, and because I dont have any goons or speed zeals I get my ass handed to me. All in all Fox gets 26 probe kills in before I am able to build a few goons to kill the tanks.

While that was going on Bold expanded to the middle(yes, expanded on a money map), because he was seriously lacking in funds. He also sends a dropship of 4 vultures over to Slings base, but Slings' defense hold firm in the face of adversity, and shoot down the dropship before it can unload it's cargo.

Not being the type to give up, Bold decides on the direct approach, and sends his 3 tanks and vultres to take down Slings' cannon wall at his entrance. Of course Slings doesn't take to kindly to this harassment and busts out a can-o-MUCHO`MUCHO`-ass on Bold. Slings army is about 4x the size of Bolds, and Slings crushes it fast enough to not lose a single zealot or dragoon. He then destroys Bold's expansion in the middle.

What about the Zerg players, you ask? Keanu_Reaver had also been idle the entire game, but he was bidding his time for his muta attack upgrade to complete. Once it was done he sent in 17 muta at Fox's base. Fox, who already had about 10 tanks, decided to be safe and started making mass gollies in case someone hit him with air. When Keanu attacked he had about 9 goliaths ready, so them backed by turret placement and continuously producing goliaths from 3 facts should help to counter the menance. But Keanu went straight for his SCVs, destroying 10 or so. Fox fled his workers then filled the sky with Hellfire Missiles. Keanu was nearly lucky enough to destroy his CC, but played it safe and returned his mutas home. Zerg guerilla tactics are quite annoying, especially with the speed of their units :/.

Amat has been pretty docile as well, creating a large defensive parameter in his base consisting of sunkens, spore, lurkers, mutas, hydra, guards and devos. Amat hasn't been attacked all game or done anything to anyone to provoke an assualt, so he has money up the mother fuxing wazoo and a large, unblemished army. Note: I did not know this. Amat sends 7 mutalisk straight to my mineral line, and I am once again forced to run my probes. I use my dragoons and scare them off, along with the help or a corsair or 2. Seeing mutas made me think amat was going for mass muta/ling strat, so I pumped a few more corsairs and got ready to hit him back.

Meanwhile, Keanu went to try his hand again vs Fox, this time with estimated 12 extra mutas. But Fox is quick, and he wasn't about to diverge from his mass goliath strategy and continued to work it. Keanu attacks Fox head on this time, not going for the mines but fighting the goliaths. It seems at first he has the advantage, but the goliaths just seem to spring out of fox holes and quickly surround the mutas. The mutalisk out number the goliaths by a few, but the goliaths attack has been upgraded and does far more dmg to them then the mutas do back. Keanu seems to try to micro for a bit, but he then must flee as his muta army begins to crumble to the goliath juggernaut. Keanu backs off, but is it for good?

While amat's mutas were hitting my resources Slings continued his assault on Bold, clearing his mine field with dragoons and obs, and entered his non-walled-in base. Bold had thrown 2 more factories down, rbinging the total to 4 and was valiantly trying to build enough tanks to fend off Slings army. Bold couldn't understand why everyone had such a huge army.

<=]]> omg, how are you guys getting so much money? :(
<Jaood> try building more then 1 probe^^
<SlingsnArrows> the minerals are stacked onto each other ;o)
<=]]> asdf, you mean there is more then 1 crystal?!
<Jaood> rofl
<SlingsnArrows> haha
<Fox^1> i am Fox!

*note: not exact words, didn't take screenshots, but very close!

This was pretty funny, because after watching the replay I found out Bold had only made about 5 SCVs to mine crystals while everyone else made 15+ ^_^.

Bold has expanded to the empty middle-right main, as Slings has all but decimated his base. As his goons finish off the blue terran main Slings sends a probe to the middle and expo where Bold once held a claim of land. Slings is merely a few pixels away from losing the expo, though, as Fox has migrated all his tanks and half his goliath army down to the outside of my cannon wall. Why Fox felt he had to kill me and not his attacker Keanu was beyond me. Perhaps it has something to do with me claiming I'm faster then Fox, or the fact I pretty much killed him in a Blood Bath ffa we played in prior to this ffa, or maybe because I copied his profile into mine word for word just to annoy him. Who knows? Any way, he sieged up outside my cannons and slowly started to blow them away. It's a good thing he came for me and not Keanu, though. Keanu didn't seem to have much of an army anyway...

Just at a peek of the tanks I knew I was fucked. I had reavers, sure, but tankrange:reaverrange::divvyopenis:smallchild. Analogies sucked ass on the SATs, but I hope that one comes through :). Anyway, I decided if I wasn't going to win this ffa I would at LEAST attack someone. I knew amat's was a base above me, and after geting my army together I loaded up 6 reavers and dropped them off within amat's confines, escorted by 8 corsairs. I left my few zealots at my main to stall for some time while I 'destroyed' amat's base. "Surely, amat stands no chance, as my corsairs own muta and reavers own ground!" I thought. Well....

I managed to kill 1 spore colony during that attack. That was pretty much it. Great, so my army was wasted, Fox is owning me, and my econ is far behind everyone elses (except maybe Bold's). But I was still alive. Fox hadn't yet killed me, why? Guess he was far too busy getting owned by Keanu. Fox got torn between 2 decisions: try to return to his base and save it or continue demolishing mine while his got owned. Well, taking a quick look at the number of guardians Keanu had was a major indication of how well his 9 goliaths would fare vs them. Besides, Fox had expanded to DivvyO's old base prior to taking down my cannons, so he still had a chance to kill me and get back in the game.

That instinct for survival kicked into me and I started building dark templar. I managed to get 2 out before Fox's tanks and goliaths destroyed my gates. The dts tried as hard as they could and gradually destroyed Fox's army in my base. This was only do to the fact that Keanu's army had completed wiped away Fox's main and all his detection. Sadly, having no detection didn't seem to phase Fox's mentality, as he sieged up by my nexus and blew it and my probes into next week. By the time my dts killed every last one of Fox's units they had a total of 19 kills. But alas, I had been rimmed up the ass as Fox had destroyed my nexus and all but 1 probe, which I had hidden on the outskirts of my base. I still had enough cash to rebuild, but now I would have a less efficient economy since I couldn't build a nexus right by the mineral/gas. For the time being I kept quiet, licking my wounds, thinking of ways to exact some revenge.

Update: Amat hasn't done much most of the game, he just sits there gathering minerals, waiting to be attacked. He has a little bit of everything, from mutas to guards, devs, hydras, and lings. Slings has taken over the middle by building mass cannons supported by templar and the rest of his army. He has also gotten carrier tech and 2 carriers hovering in his main. Bold is busy trying to rebuild his empire, Keanu is pretty much reached his peak with mass guards, devourers, and mutas. Fox is frantically rebuilding up in the northeast, and I am waiting for my nexus to warp in.

Keanu sends ling scouts to see what's up, and finds Fox deligently working on his army. Keanu sends in all his guards, devos, and mutas in for the kill. Fox has an assortment of about 30 MM, all 0/0, while Keanu's upgrades are 2/2. The battle was never in question. Fox stim his marines, his medics get to work, but with 2+ armor already added to the guardians durable hull you might as well be shooting blanks. Fox goes down. Fox stays down. Fox becomes an observer and we all ally up.

At the same exact time Slings sends in his goon/zealot army into Bold's new base. Bold, having to had restarted from scratch and low resources, doesn't have much save a few vultures. Bold's base goes down seconds before Fox gives up. He says his 'gg' and leaves.

A).Amat's base. He is just a keg of dynamite. Army is almost enough to rival Keanu's, plus, since he hasn't been building much he has over 13k in minerals in the bank stored up. He could produce an army instant in the blink of an eye with all his hatches.
B).The largest teal blob on the map is Keanu's entire army. Guards, devs, and mutas. It is a major threat, the largest one in the game.
C).See those yellow specks in my base? Slings for some reason dropped 2 zealots and a goon, and sent 2 scouts to finish me off. I am able to build a few goons to fight them off. Very annoying.
D).The SlingsnArrows Emperial Front. He has managed to cannon up major paths between bases and has taken the middle. He supports dragoons, zealots, high and dakr templar, and even a few carriers.

Basically the game has now turned into the battle of the 3 Super Powers. My army consists of a few dragoons and maybe 1-2 probes long-range mining.

Keanu's army finds a new target in Slings, the gay ass who plays mass cannon, and sends in his guard army to take down the cannons on the eastside. Slings is quick to response and does so in the form of STORMING THE LIVING HELL out of the guardians. This probably would have been less of a loss if guardians didn't have the nerving habit of stacking on top of each other. But, since they do happen to do that Keanu loses all but 3 guardians. His devourers also get some storm action, but they run the second the touch psi storm. Fox is kind enough to give his opinion on the stormage and utter rape of Keanu's guards:

<Fox^1> HOLY UFCKC OMFG!!!@!!!@!@AHAHA

Now, in a ffa it's usually a good idea to NOT announce what's going on, especially if it's how you just lost your entire army. I'm not sure who said it first, but amat saw this as his chance to take on Keanu, now that his major force was gone. Amat sent all his ground troops into Keanu's base, much to his disapproval. Keanu though is far from helpless, as his earlier sunken wall remains intact. He also has enough mutas to stop amat from breaking through into his main. As amat finds his land troops destroyed he begins planting more spore colonies within his base. Slings is rebuilding his cannons and queues up 10 carriers. I am low on minerals, so I start making archons =[.

A few minutes pass. Things are quiet. Everyone seems to be getting back into things, gathering themselves up. Hell, even I am able to get my economy back up. But it isn't long before the drums of war beat again. Keanu amasses a second armada of guardians, accompanied by his original devourers. This time though they fly out in a spread formation, over the minerals in the middle of the map. This causes less of them to die from storm and affects the dragoon range attack. Slings still has plenty of templar and 4 made carriers now.

The 4 carriers intercept the guardians from the right flank, and Keanu responds by sending in his devourers to target each carrier. The carriers, however, are in tow of 9 templar, who begin to storm the stacking devourers. Keanu orders them to break off the attack, while having some guards kill the templar. The devourers fall back into the protection of the guards. The carrier AI tells them to keep attacking the devourers, so they leave the templar undefended. The templar use up nearly the last of their storm to killing the few guards killing them, only to watch in horror as the devourers return to finish off the carriers. But there is one templar left, one with some storm left. He is Super High Templar. The last temp kills all the remaining devourers in once blast, racking up his kill score to 22. But then he dies to guards t.t.

Keanu lost maybe 10 guardians total in the little ordeal, and with no more temps or carriers to oppose him he sends in his fleet to finish off Slings. But, amat being the tricky fellow, takes the oppurtunity and sends in a force of mutas into Keanu's undefended base. Keanu continues his trek with killing Slings as guardians are quite useless vs mutas.

The brown mutalisk wreck total havoc on Keanu's main. They manage to destroy his entire sunken defense and then start hitting his main hatcheries. Keanu, having 6k minerals and over 12k decides he can't wait for mutalisk to be produced as a couter, so from all 6 hatches makes scourge. Scourge after scourge dive into amat's mutalisk, many dying before they reach their intended target. It takes Keanu almost 3 volleys of scourge before the mutalisks get dewindled down to size. But now that the sunkens are gone nothing lay between Keanu's base and getting zergling raped by amat.

But what was Slings up to? Well, the guardians had all but wiped out any trace of yellow from the middle section, killing nearly all the dragoons and zealots. Seeing it as pointless to suicide his remaining goons vs the incredibly large guardian force Slings decides to fling them around and into amat's base instead. Now, this is at the same time amat begins sending his zergling force into Keanu's base. Slings' dragoons and amat's zerglings meet head on and start fighting. Sling has unknowingly saved Keanu from the zergling, as Keanu had no real defense except the scourge. As for me I was starting to get a bit antsy. I had no clue what was going on outside my base except that the zerg players had air. At this point of the game where it was just a mass battle I knew I couldn't win so I decided I'd just be bm with corsairs and fly around the map shooting stuff.

Slings says something about being hit by mass guards and asks for a little hand vs Keanu. since I've got corsairs I thought I might as well try, and flew into his base. But hell, there is only so much damage 4-6 corsairs can do vs fully upgraded guardians. It was a slow and painful process, and my corsairs were not enough to save SlingsnArrows base. But I wasn't concerned with that. The guardians then turned due west and headed for my base. By then though, I had enough corsairs to kill the remaining weakened few without serious losses. The guards were able to kill a few pylons and that was it ;0.

While Keanu's guards were eating away at Slings' base he decided he would need some ground support. By the time his guards had died Keanu had enough money and supply to make 25 ultralisk. The ultralisk army ran south and quickly tore through Slings' remaining dragoons stationed outside amat's base. As soon as they arrived they destroyed colony after bloody colony, seemingly unstoppable. But with lurker defense, soem mutalisk, and cracklings, the stampede was stopped. Ultralisk don't do to well vs air/lurkers w/o detect.

All throughout the ordeals Keanu claimed triple teaming him was just BM. But we never actually planned to triple team him, we just sorta attacked him one after the other, because if he fell then our chances of survival significantly increased!

But Keanu isn't the type to just go idlely into the night without a fuss. He started making mutalisk again as soon as he could. Amat wasn't happy about that ultralisk attack and sent his forces straight back at Keanu. Amat's ling remains are horribly butchered, however. Keanu still had a few ultras, so once the lings attacked they were used as buffers while the mutalisk took their shots. Seemed the 25 ultras had taken more out of amat then he thought.

While the two zerg have been battling and destroying bases and what not Slings was left unaccounted for. He was able to slip a probe out earlier during the middle expo ransacking and was able to build up again a nice sized base, this time one larger and more productive then his original.

Slings also had a very nice zealot army going for him, 20+. But his anti-air was lacking. He had a few templar but that was it. So he requested that we both put forth an effort to defeat a common enemy, me lending my corsairs vs Keanu. I agreed, and when the signal was given we both charged Keanu. If, however, I had known just how much Keanu had made since then I might have re-thought the proposal and argued for a better deal. Because as it stood there was no way in hell that my 9 corsairs could beat:
But of course I'm a dumbass and went in anyway. Below the corsairs I saw a streamline of zealots heading for Keanu's base. I suppose my corsairs helped for awhile as they distracted the mutalisks attention away from the lot forces, but only for a few moments. Aside from my corsairs i also sent in 3 3 dragoons and 2 archons along to help out in anyway they could. But Slings and I didn't plan this alliance very well, and when my forces got to Keanu's choke they started fightning with Slings. The sacrifice though does not go unnoticed as the zealot forces are able to take down half of Keanu's hatcheries.

Keanu is pissed.

A minute later amat takes this chance to attack him again. It becomes a muta/dev war. Keanu's forces crush amat's, but amat is able to reproduce nearly instantly from his hatches. They battle their forces once again, but amat has a defiler nearby and plagues all the guardians. The mutalisks and dev are flying over water so the defiler can't quite reach them. Keanu's forces would have kept going into amat's bases but he had a new problem: Slings.

Even though his zealot forces lost badly Slings continued to pump units, this time mass dragoons. He also sent in 2 carriers into Keanu's resource area, hitting him from the front and back. Keanu heads back to his base with an army still poisoned by amat's devos and guards that were plagued his forces barely put a dent into Slings new army. The mutas take forever to shot their glave wurms and the guardians die to 1-2 hits from goon blast. Slings mighty Protoss 1337ness finishes off Keanu's remaining army and destroys all his major hatches. Keanu, infuriated by the turn of events, asks for obs, and the teal zerg super power falls.

<Keanu_Reaver> you guys are so fukcign bm...
<amat> hey, is jaood still alive?
<Jaood> stay away

At this point my existence hadn't made much of an impact on amat enough to get him to finish me off. But now with Keanu gone he set his sight's on me. Amat sends in a wave of newly made mutalisk followed by some guards. My archon production had just gotten under way, so when I saw the mutas I felt secure, as archon > muta. But the guards proved to be way to much for my archons alone and I retreated further into my base.

Slings, now with Keanu gone, decides to give amat some of his dragoon loving. He sends his whole into amat's base, and amat has to send his guards back for a second to defend. Amat's lurkers and cracklings prove to be more then a match for Slings' forces, so amat sends his guardians back into my base. My archons can only do so much damage before they all get killed from the consistent stream of guards flowing into my base. All my exta useless units are sent out on suicide missions. My 6 dark templar head toward Slings new base, which lacks decent detection. My dark templar have a field day on Slings base and take down 9 gateways, cybercore, citadel, and a forge before an observer scuttles to his base. Slings storms the dark templar and finishes them off with dragoons.

Slings isn't too happy with my dark templars, so sends a mobile force of units to my base. His forces meet my newest cannon wall, but decimate it. Besides having him at my front door I've still got guards/mutas in my main. Amat destroys all my probes and my nexus and I'm left with no way to defend. I hold up the white flag of defeat and I'm allowed to observe.

Now it's between amat and Slings. Amat seems to have a macro disabilty, as he doesn't seem to like to macro at all (he has 31k minerals and 10k gas yet kept getting outproduced by Keanu, wtf). Slings is currently suffering from lack of resources, because he had to relocate earlier. Slings still has templar on his side, though, so it seems it could go either way now.

After allying with me amat moves his guards east toward Slings' old base, finds it empty, and continues on in a counter clock-wise fashsion until he comes onto his mineral line, and starts laying down probes. Slings responds by busting out some storm, finishing off the guards.

At this point I'm watching what happening and thinking "Yeah, no way Slings can win. His econ got dented by the guards, and even if he kills them amat could always just amass an army quicker then he could."

Actually, the templar are able to kill off all but 2 of the guardians. Slings takes all his temps and merges them into archons, and brings back the goons he used to attack me to finish off the last remaining guardians. Slings then takes his forces (6 archons, 9 dragoons, and some zealots) and heads out to try and subdue amat.

But all is not well within the land of Mordor. Amat sends out some mutas to attack Slings, and they start fighting the Slings bragade in the middle of the map. Amat also send his new ling army to help finish off the dragoons. Then, out of the cover of darkness, evil strikes.

Keanu appeared with a newly formulated army. He had been using the "OK, Let Me Obs (While I Build Up An Army To Kill You)" ffa strategy. How noble.

Everyone was shocked, as Keanu sought some vengeance by laying siege to amat's base. Amat's ling army continued on to battle some of Slings' army, but many died as they passed under Keanu's mutas. As for amat's base Keanu just tore it up. Amat was obviously unprepared for it, and slowly but surely amat fel under Keanu_Reaver's obs bm tactics.

Slings isn't to happy about this turn of events either, as he spent quite a bit of time trying to kill the mofo. All he can do now is make dragoons and zealots and hope he can defeat Keanu before he comes back to get his base.

Over a period of 5 minutes amat contiues to send whatever he can to Keanu's base, lings, mutas, even a guard. While Keanu is busy with amat's base amat's lings manage to kill about 75% of Keanu's drones and damages some of his hatches. What is interesting to note is that from the time Keanu attacks from the time amat is elimanted by Keanu amat never said a word, as if he was so angry at him he couldn't speak(type). Or maybe he was just concentrating so much. Either way, Keanu manages to kill amat, but not before Slings attacks!

While Keanu's forces were still in amat's base Slings sent his army into Keanu's main. In an instant Keanu is able to summon up some extra mutas to help ward off the invaders. But Slings archons and dragoons will have none of it.

Slings seems to have the advantage, with storm utilization and archon spread damage. Keanu's muta forces get crippled, but not before weakening Slings' army. Keanu starts producing zerglings, and 22 guards morph in the background. Slings storms most of the mutas and devourers, and many of the zerglings die to zealots. If not for the guardians Keanu might have lost this battle. With his opposition halted for a period Keanu looks over his base and at the total damage inccured. He has lost nearly all his drones, 9 hatcheries, and a spawning pool. However, he still has some lings and a guardian force.

Slings has lost most of his army, the rest consisting of 11 templar, a few dragoons, an archon, and some DT. The one major thing that sets these 2 appart though is Keanu still has over 10k/10k in resources while Slings doesn't even have 2k.

Keanu, not wanting another battle in his main, goes in for the kill and sends his guardians, and some leftover devourers southeast to Slings. Slings storms, and uses his dragoons to fight off the force, but all seems hopeless :(.

And then...

<Keanu_Reaver> omg, jaood!!!

Why would Keanu be saying this? It probably had something to do with the 20 scouts I rush into his undefended base. Yes, scouts. All the while Keanu had been messing with amat and Slings I had decided "Do unto others...". If Keanu was going to play the bm obs game so was I! I purposely wait until all his forces are gone and then I strike, strike like the ninja master that strikes a new born baby - quick, and to the throat. My scouts hit him hard by blazing away at his greater spire. If I can get rid of that bad boy then he won't have any unit producing abilty vs my scouts, no scourge, no mutas, and no devourers. Slings, who was still in the game, had sent his last remaining ground forces into Keanu's base, 4 zealots and 4 dark templar. With the aid of the dark templar/zealots Slings and I are able to finally quell the beastly Keanu. Keanu's guards manage to finish off Slings' middle right expansion, but much to his displeasure SlingsnArrows was not eliminated.

Slings still had 1 nexus and a few pylons tucked away down in Bold's old main. Keanu expresses to us his deep seeded displeasure at being the target of our attacks and assures us we are bastards. We are then greeted with a new message:

Slings and I laugh for a bit, then he concedes defeat. Slings leaves the game, and I, Jaood, am the last man standing once the dust settles. I still remain the self-proclaimed FFA Master!!

After Thoughts:

This was a pretty fun game. I had no intention of being a bm obs, but Keanu forced me into it=[. The only reason everyone wanted Keanu dead was because we feared the competition. But I know he still loves me, so it's all good! Wish DivvyO hadn't disc, we could've been in store for more fun strats (he went nukes in our ffa on bloodbath). All the players played welled, except I never understood why amat didn't attack anyone or why Fox kept attacking me.

This report is just an exscuse to try out adode photoshop and some new styles I downloaded ^^. Hope you like it. Oh, the reason I won was very simple. The pants. Wear khaki pants. It's as simple as that. Ancient ~nohunters secret passed down for years. Mom bought'em for me, now I rock.


View or Add Comments (# of comments thus far: 94)
Back to Report Listing