|"First, my processor sucks more than Santa Claus and my modem blows more ass than Floppy the Fat sea otter. "|
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Mark4: Letís start off with the usual questions. Age?
Mark4: Height, weight?
Rook: 3í11", 125 lbs.
Mark4: Where do you live?
Rook: Well, I started life in the swamps of North Carolina near Fort Bragg, but they had enough bad asses there. I started hitch-hiking and ended up in Michigan. Thatís where I ran into Johnny. I snuck into his luggage when he moved to southern california and thatís where I am today.
Mark4: So how did you get involved with BR.com?
Rook: When I heard they were holding the mascot competition I knew that was the job for me. Man those were some tough fights!
Mark4: Speaking of which, what fight was the toughest?
Rook: Well, they were all hard but two really stand out. It took me three hours to wrestle that damn bengalaas into submision. I still have the bite marks on my (censored for reasons of public decency). Want to see?
Mark4: No! Do I look like T_mac? How about that other fight?
Rook: Well, the other one was with this death knight looking guy. He had a big double bladed sword and was about twice my size. I was worried at first but as long as I try my hardest I donít care how big someone is. They always have a weakness. I ended up blocking one of his swings with a savate kick and then slipping my butcher sword in between his second and third ribs and twisting. =]
Mark4: I think I remember that one. Weíll have a nice picture of that fight available for downloading later on the site. It seems like you were ready to lay it all on the line to work for Johnny. How much does "mascot" pay anyway?
Rook: Well, they only give me $.003 per click. It takes a while to add up. But I did get to eat one of Johnnyís cats the other day. WarriorPrincess didnít care for that too much =p.
Mark4: It seems like youíll fit right in on the BR.com staff. Feel free to eat the rest of Johnnyís cats. Any closing remarks?
Rook: Yeah, itís great to be here!